No sooner had I settled into my new apartment when suddenly my dating profiles felt like they were on steroids!

Averaging 3-5 new inquiries a day between POF and OKC has become exhausting to keep up with. Is there something in the dating water? Who let open these flood gates of men!? I’m merely one single chick just getting acclimated to this whole scene.

I’ve been taking a new approach and rather then spending time exchanging emails, texts and phone calls I’m jumping in full force and going straight to the “Coffee Date”.  Now don’t get me wrong, I am not taking every guy up on his offer to meet… I still have to weed them out a bit.

So far in the month of November I have been on 5 first dates. There was Hot-Rod – the lives at home, collecting unemployment, no cell phone guy who mentioned marriage 2 too many times for me and looked much hotter in his pics. Next we met The Lawyer – Anti-Cell phone, no Internet, tri-athlete who I knew was wrong from the start, but we had such great banter from the start that we rushed to meet, but on our second date it became apparent that he was just looking for something casual and with an hour & half distance between us, I can’t see how it will work. Then along comes Dr Seuss – who seems a little anxious, but totally overlook-able considering he is a massage therapist and how desperately I need one of them in my life… at the end of the first date he offers to get us a room so I can get my massage, which I declined, followed by an offer to go out to his van where his seats fold down AND he’s got tinted windows! Really!????

Not the best run, but I’ve now found myself interested in two men on opposite sides of the spectrum -  Mo-Mo is older, has a very good job, drives a super sexy car and just purchased a new home. The Boy is 11 years younger, still in college, just lost his job and lives at home.  While Mo-Mo is handsome and stylish he is not the kind of guy I have ever been attracted to and I fear that I am being superficial and letting his accomplishments influence my interest in him.

The boy is very much the type of guy I go for, but the age is an underlying issue for me. He reassures me it’s not a big deal and I know that as long as two people are happy it shouldn’t matter what age they are or what people outside of the relationship might think… but I’m already worried about the what if – I have to meet his family, I want him to meet mine?

So now is the question… what am I really looking to gain here? Am I looking for a boyfriend? Occasional dates? Can I continue to date and juggle with out feeling like I am being unfair or instilling false hopes in these guys? And why does it bother me so much to let a guy pay? I always feel weird about when the check comes, despite whether I want to see the guy again, am I supposed to offer to pitch in or leave a tip?

Still so much to learn about dating and honestly, I think it’s driving me to  find a boyfriend so I don’t have to deal with it any more. I like that security, I want the monogamy.

I mentioned on Twitter earlier that the current state in my digital dating game is much like a horse race. There are three top contenders at the moment who I have been communicating quite regularly with over the last two weeks.

In First we have JB – the Younger Hotty who just finalized his divorce, has sole custody of his 6yr old son, and now lives at home where his parents help him with childcare. Second in the running is Hot Teacher who works with inner city kids from underprivileged homes. I find his career so interesting and challenging. Pulling into third is Dedicated Dad – His life seems to revolve around his two boys who live out of state and he is a little bit older then my max, which concerns me.

There are a few others trailing behind who I haven’t had much chance to interact with, but may still have potential, like momma’s boy and Military Dad, and of course new contenders are being added quite regularly.

I gotta say this whole “I don’t care” attitude I’ve adopted from @SingleGal really works! As much as I would love to be actively dating and seeking out my next relationship, I am being extremely casual in conversation and letting the guys make all the effort. If they don’t, then no loss … another will come along soon.

I have had one slight setback in which I admit to getting a little hung up on Jackson, who was the first person I met online through OKC and hit it off with. He asked me to coffee, then became “busy”. I haven’t reached out or heard from him in over a week. I am pretty sure he decided I was far too awesome for him…or too high maintenance… either way – His loss.

Well I have 3 New Messages to retrieve so enough of this babbling on…but before I scoot I posted a Tip on Twitter for those of you using OKCupid, or any dating site for that matter, and feeling like your profile has gone cold. Changing your profile pic and uploading new pics regularly will gain you some additional exposure in “recent updates” areas.

You don’t need to have or take a lot of pics of yourself. I suggest having at least 3 to 4 on your computer for use, but only 2 or 3 of those actively displayed on your profile. Every couple weeks (or days depending on how anxious you are) upload one of those that is not currently active and remove one that is simply rotating through them.

Place Yer Bets & Happy Dating!